Basket.

Eighty thousand dead across Asia and Africa in one of the world's worst-ever natural disasters. I knew about it before I left on Sunday, but the toll was then still 500 confirmed dead and about a thousand missing. To return on Wednesday and find it was 50,000-60,000 and rising was rather shocking.

Even Penang got hit. A little too close to home, if you ask me, and tremors were in fact felt in Singapore. It's an awful, awful end to the year.

And why is most of the coverage centred on tourists in Phuket? It's disgusting. It seems to be sending the message that the white man's lives are more important than Asian lives.

But now, really, is not the time to argue over this. A disaster like that, it just blows the mind. Within a matter of seconds, homes were reduced to rubble and entire families swept away. Thousands of lives lost, thousands other lives ruined forever, in the blink of an eye.

December 26th, 2004. A day to remember. I hate it that I can't do much more than empathise.

I'm going to be saying basically the same things I was saying a year ago... yet another 365 days have passed and 2005 is soon to dawn. We are all no longer students and the feeling is strange. School life seems so far away now, the events of a bare few weeks before seemingly ghosts from a distant past. I know that what happened did in fact really happen, but it doesn't seem that way. As a matter of fact, it all seems like a dream now, not even distant memories. Maybe I'm going to wake up anytime and find myself back in the bunk at Tekong, the date on my watch to read 5.30am on 11 December, 2004.

But of course, it isn't going to happen. This is Reality, TM, cold and hard. Two years have passed, one year since the Countdown. Yes, it is unbelievable. I can remember last Christmas like it was last week. This is really happening to me and everything I have done and said over the past three weeks is verifiable fact.

I've been told (but positively) that I'm too philosophical. But I can't help it. I can't ignore the nostalgia that is so enamoured of returning from time to time to haunt me. Today I took 197 and passed by so many familiar places. It was Prom Night again and we were all sitting by the Singapore River. I saw myself posing once again for a photo beside the Parliament sign. The whole bunch of us walking down deserted streets and taking photos on the road. The craziest 72 hours ever - Prom, the day after, and the day after that.

If 2003 was one hell of a year, 2004 was so incredibly madcap. I never thought I'll ever live through such a year. I went to places where I had never ever previously even thought of going, both literally and figuratively. I went beyond what I thought were my limits. And it's been a stunning experience, the whole damn thing. A year of little moderation, of amazing revelations and confessions I never thought would escape my lips or reach my ears. So many new experiences and feelings.

And you know what? At the close of it all, I feel good. Bloody good.

I Live.

And of course, I'm back home for the moment. Or to be exact, the next 3 days or so.

That little fact notwithstanding, it is still wonderful to be back. (For the moment at least), no more 0530 revilles and 2230 bedtimes, screaming sergeants, some better food and a good break for my physical person (let the new calluses heal).

And I can take my time to do whatever I like to do now. That's really the best part.

A breather to be enjoyed.

The year is drawing to a close, and it's time once again for the annual long-and-very-mushy-and-cringeworthy-post. Yes, I know it is still relatively early, but 1) this time seems particularly appropriate because Prom so recently brought the curtain down for real on two years of JC and thirteen years of education and 2) Tekong has no Internet access.

Over the years, I have had the good fortune to meet quite a number of people who have helped me out greatly in many forms, and I'll like to try and thank them in this post, hoping that I don't leave out any (but I probably will, because I'm so absent-minded). These are people who have seen me at my best and my worst, and have done their best in their own ways to help me along the obstacle-strewn path of life. I have needed the help they have been so kind to render, I have enjoyed their company, and I thank them for it from the bottom of my heart.

The whole of A01C - Yes, I have said this before. You guys have in general been fantastic. Two years of JC was a very trying time, and I could not have asked for a better bunch of classmates to accompany me through it then you people. In two sometimes very difficult years, you people have given me plenty of reason to laugh and suppress the cynicism I oftentimes have to struggle to control. Truly, thanks to you guys, I still believe in the inherent goodness of humankind.

I wish to thank each and every one of you for all you lot have individually done for me, and to apologise for any offence I have ever caused any of you. The order of names is totally random, so please don't accuse me of bias. ;)

Cherylene - Thank you so much for all the emotional support you so readily provided on several occasions when I needed it most. Your kind words and reassurances certainly helped me immeasurably. You've been a friend I can share good times and bad with, and for that I am very grateful. I hope we can stay in touch (I guess that goes for just about every single friend I've made in RJ).

Mark - You are a great person to talk with, humorous and witty. I thank you for all the laughs I have got from you the past two years, which is a not inconsiderable amount. I have some very good memories of you that I will cherish, and for this I am in your debt.

Angelina - You were a good IPW group member, and I am really very thankful for that. You helped the group and I survive the whole IPW nonsense, and I thank you for this. In addition, you have been kind and caring on occasions that it was called for. I regret somewhat not trying harder to know you better.

Yi San - You've been a true friend (and as a bonus, a very interesting character) I could share interesting stories, witty banter and gripes about anything and everything under the sun with. I was never afraid that you wouldn't lend a listening ear whenever there was something I needed to get off my chest, and that is really quite a comfort.

Sona - You have been a good person to talk to, and that itself is invaluable. Sometimes one just needs an opposite number to share tales and inane banter with, and you have been that opposite number on more than a few occasions. I am grateful to you for providing this outlet.

Angeline - I'll like to begin with an apology; I know we have tangled before, and it was mainly my fault. I am sorry for being so petty and I am grateful that you are big-hearted enough to simply brush it all aside. That said, you have been a good classmate and a dedicated Lit rep, and I respect and thank you you for this.

Shuang Ning - You have been a great classmate and I consider you a close friend; I am glad you think of me likewise. You have lent me emotional support and a listening ear on more than one occasion these two years past, and I am very, very grateful for it. You are someone I respect and admire, and I am very thankful for your friendship. As with everyone else, stay in touch.

Roger - Again, I'll like to begin with an apology; if with my sharp tongue I have these past two years given you any offence, I sincerely apologise. Sometimes my mouth runs ahead of my brain and I may have said some unpleasant things to you these two years past. I realise it was all rather infantile, and I'm sorry for the trouble. That said, you have been a good person to interact with these past two years; I have enjoyed conversing with you, and good conversation to me is an invaluable asset.

Elgin - I'm sorry I never got to know you better, but thank you for all the aid you ever rendered me this past two years. Life would have been rather more difficult without it. You have been most selfless in helping others and that is a quality I truly respect.

Qiyan - Eighteen years as near-neighbours and we were none the wiser. Well, thak you for all the entertainment you and Zihao ever provided for us all. You were a great guy to laugh with and laugh at. :)

Sean - I'm sorry we grew apart after the halcyon days of the first 3 months, but you remained someone I could depend on. You have these past two years offered me advice and listened to me when I needed to let off steam, and for that I am very grateful. You've really been a friend to me. Stay in touch, ok?

Daniel - My friend of nearly six years, you have helped me immeasurably in all that time, whether you realise it or not. I'm sorry we have grown apart relatively recently, but I share with you many memories I will keep in my heart and treasure always, and I can only hope this is also the case for you. Nevertheless, you have always been willing to help, to console and comfort and to provide good conversation. I am grateful to have known you, and if I ever gave you offence at any time in this half-decade, I am truly sorry and hope you will forgive me.

Jieqi - I've known you even longer. You have been a great classmate - someone who has been willing by turns to both laugh with me and listen to my troubles. your kinds words and gestures have helped me out very much indeed. You have been a good friend for years and for that I am very grateful. Hope we can stay in touch, unlike when we failed to in four years of secondary school.

Yaxin - I really need to apologise to you. I admit to losing my temper at you more than once, and looking back, I wonder why I was so petty. In the big scheme of things, does it really all matter? I'm sincerely sorry for being so nasty and I hope you will forgive me.

Genevieve - You have been a friend indeed. Again, someone I could both laugh with and share my troubles with. That is, to me, invaluable. Great as a classmate and even better as a friend. Thank you very much for everything.

Justin - To say you have been a good friend to me would be doing you an injustice. I wish I could find better words. Suffice to say that you have played a very large role indeed in making these two years livable for me. You have seen me at my best and my worst, and never been shy to do your best to help me out. You are really someone I can trust implicitly and call upon whenever I need help. You have done so much for me, and I only so little for you. This is something I should be ashamed of. I am really in your debt, and I can sincerely say I could never have survived two years of JC without you as my classmate and good friend.

I look forward to your continued friendship.

Zihao - What can I say about you? Another who has been more than a good friend. Very much more. One who has helped me so much and asked for so little in return. I am very, very fortunate to have got to know you, and by accident of fate, have you end up in the same class once more. For more than half a decade you have helped me in so many and various ways I cannot even begin to list them. You are really someone I can go to no matter the problem, someone I can laugh with no matter the joke, and someone who will always give his all to help me along whenever I am in trouble.

I wish words were adequate to express the gratitude I feel towards you for what you have done for me over this past half-decade. I guess I have to make do with an extremely inadequate thank you. Yes, thank you for everything you have ever done, and sorry for throwing at you hissy fits you have for the most part not deserved. Again, I could not have survived secondary school or JC without you. I really hope we stay in touch.

Now, to move on to other friends who these years have helped me so much in their own ways.

Winston - I don't have a best friend, but you are certainly one of the closest friends I've got. Thank you very much for the SMS, I will certainly take good care of myself and contact you the moment I leave that bloody island. We have known each other for nearly four years now, and I have always enjoyed your company. Thank you for always being willing to listen, for all the crude jokes and songs and stuff, for laughing with me and consoling me on the occasions when I have felt down. Thank you very much indeed.

Yihong - I'm glad we stayed in touch. Your company has been so enjoyable these few years. You have been someone I can truly talk to about anything and everything under the sun, and by being this, you have been a great help to me.

The rest of 4E 2002 - Sorry, if I tried to list all 33 of you it would be much too long a post... I guess I have to thank you as a single entity. Thank you very much for a very enjoyable two years in RI and thereafter. You guys were a truly wonderful class.

Special mention: Jason Tan - Whatever we have slung at each other these past two years, you have been a friend, and one who has always been willing to listen, to advise and to comfort. You have always been there whenever I needed someone to talk to. Truly, you have helped me greatly these two years. Stay in touch.

And of course, I can hardly leave out my dear CCA-mates.

HISSOC Exco - Thank you so much for being such amazing people to work with. You guys somehow managed ot be both serious about work and humorous at the same time. It made all those long, long evenings doing Tse Yang's bidding so much more easy to bear. I'm very fortunate to have had people like you guys to work with, and I am grateful to every single one of you simply for being the people you are.

RJC Archives: Nizam, Jen and Aaron - Special tribute to the three of you. We certainly made our little sub-committee (?) a force to be reckoned with, didn't we? Nizam, you were a good leader and not above sharing a few laughs too. Jen, thanks so much for all the good times and laughter. Aaron, you have truly been a friend to me and I am very grateful to you for that. All three of you, thanks so much, and I will remember you lot forever.

And then there are the teachers.

Mr Brian Ng - Thank you so much for being the teacher and more than you were. Not above mixing with us guys, your constant fodder of Irish, Mat or Singh jokes never failed to brighten my day. You were unquestionably one of the best form teachers I ever had, and I am very grateful for it. Thank you so much for everything, including hosting so many class gatherings all these years, and all the best for your book.

Mr Aaron Loh - Thank you so much, too, for being a teacher and more. For all the concern you showed us and your endless willingness to help; to console, advise and share a joke or two. I, we, could not have asked for a better CT to ease us into JC life. You did a wonderful job. All the best in your future endeavours.

Ms Mona Chew - Thank you, Ms Chew, for always trying your best to help us tide over what has at times seemed an absolutely impossible JC2 year. You have always been willing to listen, to be concerned about your students, without even once losing your temper. That is very, very admirable, and I salute you for it. You have been a great CT. All the best for the future.

I know this list is not exhaustive, and I apologise for it. Plenty more have undoubtedly in all their little ways helped me through these two years, and the four of secondary school, and I am sorry I cannot mention you all. The best I can offer is a thank you and an apology if I left you out. Rest assured it was not intentional.

Truly, I could not have done it without you people.

Once more, thank you everyone. You have helped absolve me so I can go in without any regrets. For those who sent in good wishes, thanks very much, I really, really appreciate it.

IThis will be the last post for a while, but 'll be back soon enough. Till then, good day everyone, and for those who are reading, thank you for taking all that trouble to look through a long list of ramblings.

Exeunt.

Now I've got the time to post about prom. Didn't previously.

Or rather, Sunday itself, because prom was but one aspect of a great day.

So I arrived at Suntec City with Jason (how I came to be with him on that day itself is a tale of its own, one that I will not tell here) at 6.40pm on Sunday, and the first thing I find out is I'm badly underdressed, with the same short-sleeved shirt I wore to Grad Night two years ago and long pants. Everyone else male had either a long-sleeved shirt or a coat or a tie, or all three elements.

The second thing I found out is, I could not recognise so many of the girls. They were transformed (into something better, of course) by make-up and very expensive-looking clothes (yes, I have no fashion sense but then again I never ever pretended that I did). It took a while for me to figure out their identities, and in some cases I never succeeded. But well, damn did they all look good.

So we stood around outside and took plenty of photos, for each other and with each other. Then it was time to go in, and the MC had a hard time getting us all seated because people were still running about snapping each other. True to assurances, the place looked resplendent. Dinner was served, and it was good. Certainly, it was head and shoulders above the stuff we got two years ago. The "shark's fin" (I know, it wasn't real) in particular certainly exceeded my expectations.

After that, the programme planned was at best unremarkable and at worst, plain boring. I have no idea why they had to hire an MC - Jireh and Amogh can do it for free; they did so two years ago and had us absolutely in stitches. I remember with great fondness their wonderful impression of our poker-faced O-Level chief examiner. But this guy? He just couldn't get the laughs out of the audience.

It was still fun though, running around taking photos and having photos taken, or looking at the unique costumes some people wore.

The whole thing came to an end about 11.30pm, and more photo-taking followed. Then we returned to the hotel room we had booked (nearly getting lost on the way and avoiding such a fate only because I thought I recognised the hotel building). We took some time to recover spent energies, then left the hotel again to just look around at what we could do in Singapore in the wee hours of the morning.

The answer turned out to be, not much. But what there was sure was fun. We walked around deserted streets and were amused to see taxis slow down voluntarily for us. We took many more photos, including a class photo on a deserted main road (craziness). After finding a convenience store open at Boat Quay, we bought some food and just sat by the Singapore River talking and looking at the deserted but still brightly-lit city.

I could have sat there all night/morning, but we decided we had to move on. Most of us went clubbing, but I returned to the hotel room with about three others, as our attire was inappropriate. Not that I'm much into this activity in any case.

We just relaxed and played cards until the rest returned, and spent the rest of the hours of darkness talking and reminscing as a class. Most fell asleep by the time day decided to break, but I didn't manage to catch a wink. More disturbingly, my vertigo was acting up, although it wasn't too serious.

So a band of us took a walk to clear our heads, and it was breakfast at MacDonald's for us. Then we returned to the hotel and I did manage to catch a bit of sleep. The rest of the morning was simply spent stoning around, playing cards or watching the occasional bit of television.

We parted ways at 12pm. JC is officially over. I have the greatest confidence that I will stay in touch with the many friends I made in these wonderful two years. I could not have wished for better classmates to accompany me all this time. Thank you, A01C. I will miss you lot, but I will remember you all forever. Stay in touch, ok?

"Yesterday, December 7, 1941 - a date that will live in infamy - the United States of America was suddenly and deliberately attacked by naval and air forces of the Empire of Japan."

-President Franklin Delano Roosevelt, asking the Congress of the United States of America to authorise the declaration of war on Japan, December 8 1941

America's worst-ever military disaster, the attack on Pearl Harbor sixty-four years ago this day has been the subject of countless books, more than a few movies (none of whom are much good) and the usual motherload of conspiracy theories (FDR knew the Japanese were coming!). More than 2,000 Americans died that day, and it is quite possible that the world we know today owes itself to the very simple fact that the three aircraft carriers of the American Pacific Fleet were out on routine patrol and not in harbour that fateful morning.

Commemorate this day, then, for all the lives needlessly lost to mankind's inexorable greed and hubris.

A whole lot more has happened in these few days... I'll need the next post for it.

Good day everybody! Today we have test on MORALS! One question and one question only! Pick the answer that seems the most MORAL to you!

Now, when you have a problem with someone, do you

a) Approach said person to trash out problem
b) Bitch about said person behind said person's back
c) Masturbate
d) None of the fucking above

The correct answer is A and wise guys about this can take their smart mouths and fuck off to hell.

Because if there is anything on this green Earth that can fucking piss me off more than irresponsible people, it is despicable liars.

Haven't the guts to come and find me to trash out the problem? Then don't fucking talk behind my back, fucking cunt. If you think there is a problem, the onus is fucking on you to fucking approach me, not wait like the motherfucking lord of the fucking galaxy for me to come on all fucking fours grovelling at your feet, fuckhead.

Motherfucking coward.

December 2004. One year ago, I didn't even want to think that this day would come. But come it has. Will I be here in December 2005 to write a similar entry? Or December 2006? Or December 2007? Who knows?

RI's 4E 2002 came together tonight for what will be our last class gathering in quite a while. We had a great time, as always, with the main activity involving trying to get drunk and swapping bawdy comments at high volume. I didn't think it would feel so good to be able to once more engage in filthy talk; yes, believe it or not, I hold myself back during A01C mixed-gender gatherings. The stuff we said tonight and we usually say at all-male 4E gatherings would make the stuff we do say in front of A01C's girls look like nursery rhymes in comparison.

I really love this class, and I'm going to miss them. We had a wonderful two years in RI, then some more great moments after graduation. But all things must some time come to an end, and this is no exception.

I don't think I can really complain and call myself unlucky and anything. It's good fortune that I was placed in first 4E than A01C - both are in their different ways wonderful bunches of people. It's been a magnificent four years, and more recently, a magnificent week, with all these various people. I'll miss them. I really will.

We are all slaves to reality, and there must always be an end.