Basket.

I was kind of going to save this for a good, end-of-year post, but recent events and an on-going depressive bout have forced me to reconsider.

What is it about? It's about how things are fucking broken in this country.

The most recent proof? The newspaper of two days ago, when our paramount leader actually suggested that if a so-called "rogue" government somehow got into power in the future, the military would have to step in to restore order.

Does that sound like anything much to you? It should, because what he just suggested is that the SAF should launch a military coup and overthrow a possibly democratically elected government, replacing it with a junta, because this government might not be running the country the way he himself would. Effectively, he legitimised, even authorised, if I want to go a little too far, such a blatant violation of democracy and the rule of law. In times like these, when the byword is "engagement" and people are no longer being arrested and tortured for creative mockery of the country's leaders, it is an unbelievably rash thing to say.

The other scary part is how nobody seemed to notice or care - and how it appeared on the front page of the newspaper without anyone batting an eyelid.

In a politically aware society, nothing like that would ever happen. But what kind of society is this? One that is a lot more concerned with the soulless pursuit of base coin - not that you didn't already know that, of course. But every day I get more and more disgusted with people, with Singaporeans, with materialistic, mercenary, selfish, insensitive, inconsiderate, ignorant, greedy, spoilt Singaporeans.

Ever notice one thing (other than, well, people insisting on getting on before you get off) on the MRT? When it is fairly crowded, there will always be space in the middle of the carriage. Everyone who is standing is basically crowded around the doors. This is because the sheer vast effort of moving a metre or less into the centre of the carriage will cause their expiration from complete exhaustion. Even if they somehow summon up a magnificent effort of will to survive this Herculanean task, the equally great effort of moving one more metre towards the doors when they reach their desired stop will definitely kill them. As such, they all have perfectly good reasons for crowding around the doors and doing their best to prevent people who wish to board the train from, well, boarding. I mean, how can be expect such monumental sacrifices from common working people?

The joy such noble life-preserving souls bring to me on any given MRT ride is only compounded by the melodious sound of children's voices I always have the good fortune of hearing. Whenever I look upon children excitedly playing around on the MRT, trying to scale the support poles or hang onto the grab-holds, I am filled with the utmost nostalgia and happiness - that I am so fortunate to be able to witness the vigour and shining athleticism of our youth. I am only more pleased by the fact that the parents of these bright young things make no effort at all to restrain them from their excited play, but instead allow them to exhibit all the qualities of strong, young, healthy ubermenschen who will in future no doubt bring our great nation to ever greater heights. Music to my ears, as youthful energy ebbs and flows around me. Paradise, but what else?

No, fucking hell, people; what the fuck is so difficult about moving into the centre of the train so I don't have to defy the laws of matter (allegedly, matter cannot be compressed) and stand about 2cm from the door? And if I had my way, the only sounds I would be hearing from children who play on the MRT would be their pitiful cries as I baste them slowly over a spit; the only movement, that of their charred limbs as the last motor neurons burn out.

And those who engage in the lovely practice of forcing your way onto the train before I can get off, you deserve to die a bloody death crushed under its wheels. Unfortunately, the only thing I can actually make you do is eat my elbow shove.

If this is the sort of society the PAP has created after forty years in power, I wouldn't be averse to trying out a "rogue" government. But no, the army's going to stop that, apparently.

And on to the army. I used to think, the less said about it the better, but fuck that. I am going to vent.

It's true. Singapore is a tiny island city-state in a volatile part of the world, an island of prosperity in a sea of misery and deprivation. We have no natural resources, except our people, and our defence does depend entirely on ourselves. This is all true.

Given that, what I now want to ask is, why the fuck are we treating our most valuable, only natural resource like fucking dirt?

The fucking way our military is managed is fucking broken. It is the most bankrupt system on an island of bankrupt systems. Let us take a look at the Seven SAF Core Values: Loyalty to Country, Leadership, Discipline, Ethics, Professionalism, Fighting Spirit and Care for Soldiers. Let us examine each in detail.

Loyalty to Country - Straightforward. Be loyal to your country, serve it, repay the debt of gratitude you owe it for bringing you up. But what if your country enjoys fucking you over? Again and again and again? How easy would it be, then, to remain loyal? Would you keep as a friend someone who lies to you, cheats you and uses you? I would - keep him in a coffin after burying a kitchen knife in his jugular vein. But back to the point. How do we stay loyal to a country that doesn't seem to give a fuck about its citizens? Look at transport fees rising without any discernible improvement in service. If they actually cared, we wouldn't be threatened with yearly price increases. If they actually cared, people who choose not to vote government wouldn't be discriminated against in its plans. If they actually cared, the government would be a little more loyal to the populace that supports it.

Leadership - So, any of you think the leadership in our armed forces is of any standard worth mentioning? I didn't think so. The truth is that the general quality of leadership in the SAF, from the tiniest 3SG and up, is abysmal. Isn't leadership all about leading your men, going through thick and thin with them, inspiring them to greater heights, etc (ie load of fucking bollocks I cannot bloody remember)? Well, when is the last time you felt inspired by your OC or CO or whatever? Nope, can't say I know the feeling either. What the fuck do they learn in their fancy command schools, anyway? Judging from most of the sorry lot, only a loud command voice and a daub of megalomania.

Discipline - Yes, every army needs it. I don't deny that. But the SAF has a very healthy surplus, and although surpluses are good most of the time, it isn't here. Discipline can very easily become an excuse for sadism and autocracy, for power-drunk commanders to shout at men in push-up position, "Gentlemen, you think I like to do this?!" (by the way, I always answered, in my heart of hearts, "yes"). All I (and surely many, many others) want is for us to be respected and treated as the decent human beings most of us are, instead of like potential runaway slaves. Because, quite honestly, some of the things enforced in the name of discipline border on the ridiculous - such as wholly unrealistic fall-in timings. If you had a bloody robot army, you'll probably be able to do that, but we are flesh and blood. Humans feel tired, sometimes for no reason. Humans can have bad days, lazy days, manic-depressive days. It's time the organisation learnt to accept that in the lower ranks, because they sure as fucking hell tolerate it at senior commander level.

Ethics - So... SAF? Ethics? Does... not compute. Nope, the SAF is a morally bankrupt organisation, exemplified by the mysterious Eight Core Value, which is Do Anything, Just Don't Get Caught. You'll be surprised how widespread this is. Or who am I kidding, you'll probably not. All ranks lie, cheat and purposely conceal the truth, all the time, to get whatever it is they want. The number of malingerers you see around ought to tip you off on this. But the organisation itself lives a lie. No need to properly clean the vehicles regularly, we'll just repaint them when NDP comes around. No need to ensure that the admin system runs efficiently and correctly all the time, we'll just get everything together in a massive effort of will in time for the audit, and what we can't put together, we'll try our best to hide. Oops, I made a mistake; time to corr... I mean, conceal it. Our systems have dangerous defects. Never mind, when an accident happens we'll just blame the poor guy it happens to. Well, since part of happiness is deceiving oneself...

Professionalism - Don't fucking make me laugh. Why should NSFs like us exhibit professionalism when the professionals themselves don't? When so many of the professionals sit around drinking coffee and talking rubbish the whole fucking day while they draw our parents' hard-earned money? Why should we, at four hundred dollars a month, put in any effort at all to be hardworking and honest when so many of them lie and backstab their way to bonuses and promotions?

Fighting Spirit - Only one thing to say: How many of our regulars are going to stay and fight when, touch wood, war really comes?

Care for Soldiers - Well, the best for last, like they say. When have you ever felt cared for by this organisation? Nope, I don't know the feeling either. The SAF does not give a fuck about you. Unless, of course, you are a) An Officer, b) Handsome enough to make a recruitment poster, c) A scholar or d) All of the above. Otherwise, you're expendable. I was surprised, you know, to read in the Informal Punishment Directive that commanders are not allowed to make soldiers stay in push-up position for any length of time. How many of you have ever experienced that? Yup, I have too. If our commanders cannot even follow a simple welfare rule like that, what more the bigger things? Would such commanders really be willing to share weal and woe with their men, to respect them and to make sacrifices for them? Would units composed of such officers and understandably surly men really be useful when push comes to shove?

Instead of actually trying to follow this Core Value, the SAF tries its best to make life intolerable for the majority of its men (excluding those four groups above) in the name of Discipline. Alright, that's a very fine, thick stick you got there to jam up my ass, now where is the fucking carrot? Instead, we are robbed at four hundred dollars a month, piled with work that is not ours and forced to be deferential to lesser men. Even from this paltry allowance, we are forced to pay every month for things we do not desire, and the yearly AHM Charity donation is little more than extortion. Isn't charity supposed to come from the heart? Isn't the spirit of giving supposed to be more important than the amount of cold, hard cash received? Well, I guess not.

The SAF is a creature of society. I guess it isn't surprising then that it's every bit as money-grubbing. Historically, the armed forces have always been composed of the scum of the earth, anyway. For centuries, the British army and navy certainly were, and the army crushed Louis XIV's vaunted French legions, shattered Napoleon's pampered Imperial Guard and won two world wars - all while the navy built an empire upon which the Sun truly never set. They may have been scum, but at least they could fight. In Singapore, the regulars are truly the scum of the earth, and if they can fight, I'll eat my hat.

Two months more, and then it's a great big "Fuck You and Fuck Off". Pity I still have to bear with the MRT hordes.